Monday is D-Day…Unless You’re Bin Laden


Ugh. Food/sun/pool/fireworks coma here. How ’bout you?

A few days ago, I decided to go on South Beach Supercharged. Except I refuse to do the Phase I/like Atkins induction. Of course, I blew the holiday weekend. I have to start over. Which got me thinking…what day of the week do you like to start your diet? My analysis goes like this:

Sunday = Optimal Day. It’s the beginning of the week, after all. Also, if I blew it on Fri/Sat, and am good on Sunday, I can convince myself that the weekend wasn’t a total wash (on the other hand…if I blow Fri/Sat, I often figure, “screw it, the weekend’s blown anyway, might as well eat, pass the honeybuns!”)

Monday = Optimal Day #2. It’s the start of the work week. The weekend is blown so I’ll start fresh. It’s always easiest to be good at work for me. I can pack my food and they don’t let me out for lunch so if I can make it ’til 5:30 I’m probably going to be ok.

Tuesday = A toughie. I’m still technically ahead of Hump Day. If I’m good from Tuesday on…I haven’t totally effed myself over for the week, but I am approaching critical mass.

Wednesday* = Uhh. Who the hell starts a diet on a Wednesday? Crazy people. Osama Bin Laden maybe, that’s who.

Thursday = Hey, it’s a day before the weekend. Probably Ghandi wouldn’t even have started a diet on a Thursday.

Friday = Look, I’m insulted even by the suggestion that it is permissible to start a diet on a Friday. How dare you? Er…me.

Saturday = Hmmm. At first blush, it would seem starting on a Saturday would buy me a seat on the first flight to CrazyTown. However, if I start on Saturday, I’ve given myself a real jump start for the week. I mean, maybe I could have a random Big Lunch Wednesday if I’ve been good since the Saturday leading up to it. That’s kind of cool. (Note: I’ve never actually been able to do the Saturday Start. It’s more of a theory, like Worm Hole Time Travel. It’s sounds cool and plausible, I’ve just never actually seen it done.)

*A potential exception to the Wednesday Start. If Wednesday is also the first day of the month, or spring or something, I could possibly buy the logic of a Wednesday Start. Nevertheless, I’m still pretty sure only terrorists start their diets on Wednesdays.

Thoughts? What’s your optimal Start Day?


17 Responses to “Monday is D-Day…Unless You’re Bin Laden”
  1. Just reading this depressed me. I can be good for two, maybe three days in a row. This past weekend has done me in. I don’t know when to start this week’s new regime..maybe next week. Maybe next January?

  2. perpstu says:

    Thanks for giving me something to laugh about on a blah Monday morning!

  3. Meg says:

    I feel your pain…I ate and drank more this weekend than I had in a long time and it already shows. As far as I am concerned there is no optimal start day, you just have to decide you are going to do it and keep it up. I do really, really well during Lent because I am Catholic and I guess I think God will strike me down if I don’t keep my “promise” of no liquor or nothing fried or working out religiously (ha) every day…otherwise, it’s too easy for me to find something else to do or just think I will start my diet again…tomorrow.

  4. Mama Zen says:

    Gotta be Monday, of course. Just not this Monday!

  5. furiousBall says:

    I’d say start it on a Monday. Unless it’s Monday, then definitely next Monday

  6. i actually like your Sunday reasoning…

  7. P.O.M. says:

    Weekend starts are always much easier, especially when there are sabatoging food-whores at the office!

    You’re hil.ari.ous!

  8. Greta says:

    MPM – I’m 1/2 way through day 3. I skeered.

    perpstu – my pleasure!

    Meg – fear of God is a great motivator 😉

    MamaZ and FB – I like the cut of your jibs

    Leslie – Aw yeah!

    P.O.M. Damn whores! Also…I was remiss in my Sunday link love. I’ve rectified. Check her out peeps!

  9. noble pig says:

    It’s definitely a Monday for me!

  10. Michelle says:

    Cracking me up!! Let’s see…I go with starting the day after you have a meltdown because you *just* realized, I mean really realized, how fat you are. Not YOU you, I mean the general you. You’re not fat at all. :)

  11. I like your thinking…there’s always SOME excuse I can come up with for putting off the inevitable. I am getting older, tho, and that kind scares me…I’ll think about that tomorrow.

    P.S.: Mental Mama and I went back and got your luggage! 😉

  12. MizFit says:


    POM *does* make a valid point about the foodwhores.

  13. Cathy C says:

    I am not sure if any day that ends in a “Y” is a good
    day to start a diet – that is why I just pick one and go
    for it. 😉


  14. Lori says:

    Definitely a Monday. But preferably a Monday that is also the first of the month (as long as I’m not PMSing). Even better, if January 1 is a Monday, but then I’m hungover and so really the whole year is just shot to hell!

  15. Joy says:

    Monday is the day to start if you had to pick a day. I am with you all the way! But, I find I start over everyday. Each day I try to do better than the last – if not in the eating healthy (and less) then in getting in more activity.

    Hey – I like your blog!!!

  16. Shelley says:

    Definitely Monday. Hell, I start every Monday. I usually do well until Thursday. Friday and Saturday are my days off from work, and everything goes to hell. Sunday is a recovery day, and then I start on Monday. See how simple that is?


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