This Hoodie Makes Me Look Skinny

23

When I wear a pair of yoga pants and a t-shirt I feel exposed. All my flabbiness is on view for everyone at the gym or at the gas station to see. UNLESS I disguise my mid-section by an amazing item of clothing. Let me share my secret to instant good looks. It’s called a hoodie. I am of the firm belief that IF you take an XL hoodie and tie the sleeves around your waist then let the hood AND body of the sweatshirt trail down your butt - you look much better.

Four inch thick fabric wadded up around the mid-section is the key to really looking pulled together, I believe. I am also hoodie magicnot alone. Many woman are with me on this. The bunged up sweatshirt hanging on to the hips for dear life is just the ticket to deceive the general public into thinking that we are fit and active.

The Hoodie Hides Everything Principle goes beyond science and into the realm of mystical. The hoodie’s power transform a body is undefinable. Please join me in disuading researchers from trying to nail down the physics at work here. Let’s just go with it.

Step away from the 3-way mirror and affirm..THE HOODIE MAKES ME LOOK SKINNY. 



Comments

23 Responses to “This Hoodie Makes Me Look Skinny”
  1. Practiced that very technique yesterday. Worked like a charm.

  2. Kiki says:

    You are wise in the ways of hoodies Mental P.

    Kikis last blog post..This Hoodie Makes Me Look Skinny

  3. I’m all about the distracting properties of more fluff.
    I wish they would bring legwarmers back and get rid of all of this cancle talk.

    Deb on the Rockss last blog post..The portal to the message in Burn After Reading

  4. Hmmm… that’s very true Deb. We didn’t have cankles back in the 80s, did we?

    Charlie Hillss last blog post..What About Exercise?

  5. Kiki says:

    Didn’t The Cankles sing “Walk Like an Egyptian?”

    Kikis last blog post..This Hoodie Makes Me Look Skinny

  6. do you remember a few years back when a company came out wiht this thing you tied around your waist like a hoodie but had much less fabric to reduce bulk? It was a totally non-functional piece of clothing- its sole purpose was to tie around your waist and disguise the tummy and butt. It was ridiculous…but it sold.

    WeightingGames last blog post..5 Ways to Master Your Emotions

  7. Lori says:

    Yes! When the belly is feeling less than toned out comes the hoodie. So bascially I add one everyday!

    Loris last blog post..Could It Be?

  8. MizFit says:

    oooh that was what I was gonna say WG.
    those things cracked me UP until I saw how well they sold.

    then? not so funny no mo’

  9. Nicole says:

    Stacy and Clinton, from what not to wear, are crying and tearing out their hair over this post.

    Nicoles last blog post..Fat Blog- Day 253

  10. Scary Mommy says:

    That’s my uniform!!!

    Scary Mommys last blog post..Cable company drives housewife to insanity

  11. Cathi says:

    love your site, but I couldn’t disagree more on tying
    a hoodie around your waist/hips, not a chance is that
    flattering ..

    Just my opinion. Very honest blog. Anxious to read more.

  12. Bev says:

    ROFL um, ok, if you say so! I’ll stick with just pretending my slowly demising large ass & gut are looking good even at this weight.. but gonna look better at the prime weight I’m striving for! LOL

    Whatever makes YOU feel good… that’s what works.

  13. Marilyn says:

    I love this site. I find these blogs so funny to read. People make all the excuses in the world to cover up the fat areas but there is no need to do that. Marilyn’s Plan is not a diet but a way of eating the food you normally eat providing it is reasonably healthy food and losing the weight. Last month I sent a book to an Orthopaedic Surgeon. I often see Doctors, Nurses and people who you would not expect to be overweight carrying extra weight. I just can’t help it but giggle when I send a book to them. Even my Celebrities who are on My Plan absolutely love it. I’m hoping to get a few more of them on my website soon too. I don’t need a hoodie. lol

  14. angela t says:

    What if the hoodie wont fit around your waist lol

  15. petter says:

    I actually have a strange fetish for this exact thing, and the hoodie is my favorite item.
    So if someday you’re walking around outside with your hoddie tightened good and tight, and a man you don’t know jams a 10$ bill down your top, you might just have run into me!

  16. Frannie says:

    I tried it today. Does the trick. Great idea!

  17. Wow..hoodies are such controversy! lol.
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  18. The waist hoodie comes in handy when it gets cold too!
    .-= dental internet marketing´s last blog ..Dental Internet Marketing For New Patients On AutoPilot =-.

  19. Aisha says:

    hey…its a funny blog i like it…
    .-= Aisha´s last blog ..Disasters of Internet Addiction =-.

  20. Gordon says:

    I liked the post I thought it was very clever. It’s to bad more people don’t now about the magic powers of the Hoodie

  21. I so enjoyed every bit of this site and I’ve bookmarked your blog to

    keep up with the new topics you will post in the future.

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