This Hoodie Makes Me Look Skinny
When I wear a pair of yoga pants and a t-shirt I feel exposed. All my flabbiness is on view for everyone at the gym or at the gas station to see. UNLESS I disguise my mid-section by an amazing item of clothing. Let me share my secret to instant good looks. It’s called a hoodie. I am of the firm belief that IF you take an XL hoodie and tie the sleeves around your waist then let the hood AND body of the sweatshirt trail down your butt - you look much better.
Four inch thick fabric wadded up around the mid-section is the key to really looking pulled together, I believe. I am also not alone. Many woman are with me on this. The bunged up sweatshirt hanging on to the hips for dear life is just the ticket to deceive the general public into thinking that we are fit and active.
The Hoodie Hides Everything Principle goes beyond science and into the realm of mystical. The hoodie’s power transform a body is undefinable. Please join me in disuading researchers from trying to nail down the physics at work here. Let’s just go with it.
Step away from the 3-way mirror and affirm..THE HOODIE MAKES ME LOOK SKINNY.