Fifteen Pound Foe
You ever get to that point where the needle on the scale just won’t budge? I’ve lost 10 pounds many times this year but each time I get close to a fifteen pounds weight loss something sinister intervenes to nudge me back up.
I had almost lost 15 pounds when Christmas cookies jumped into my mouth by the dozen. A few months ago I was close to 15 pounds lost and I stopped exercising. Another time, as I approached my 15 pounds, this alien landed in my kitchen and forced me at the point of his ray gun to eat the rest of the Cheerios w/extra sugar on top. Last summer I was at 14 pounds down and I visited Disneyworld.
I’ve come to believe this is not random coincidence. There is an organized, vindictive, and nasty enemy whose sole mission is to keep me from losing 15 pounds. This Fifteen Pound Foe has my number and controls the forces of the universe and does not want me to lose 15 (or more) pounds.
So here I am again.. at the brink. It’s a dangerous time. I’m 14 pounds down from my high point. In another week I know I’m going to achieve a 14 pound weight loss. But I can feel my Fifteen Pound Foe’s malignant energy. He’s out there. Stalking me.
Fifteen Pound Foe will become enraged next week when I step on the scale and it reveals that I’m down 14 pounds. Fifteen Pound Foe will bake me a cake or offer me a super-sized french fry. If I resist these food temptations that’s when my Fifteen Pound Foe will start playing lowdown and dirty. Fifteen Pound Foe will work on my emotions. Fifteen Pound Foe will influence television network executives to air Beaches, Terms of Endearment or Brian’s Song on t.v. so I will cry my eyes out and comfort myself in a tub of ice cream. Fifteen Pound Foe will haul me up again and imprison me in a weight I hate.
So why fifteen pounds? It is not my goal weight but it is a major hurdle. Fifteen Pound Foe knows that on the other side of 15 pounds are lower sizes that I haven’t fit into for years. I miss those sizes, those lower weights. I want to be reunited with them.
So bring it Fifteen Pound Foe, bring it. I know you’re out there. I’m ready for you. I’ll vanquish you this time. And when I finally lose 16 pounds I will reward myself. (Cue ominous footsteps.)
So what point can’t you get past?