Unless you’re living under kryptonite or stuck in some rift in the space-time continuum, you’ll have heard of James Cameron’s Avatar. For benefit of those rift dwellers, the basic gist is this. Scientists invent a way to grow a human/alien hybrid “shell” body and link it up to your brain waves. In other words, you get to drive around in a whole new body (of course, Cameron’s version is Ty-D Bowl blue and 12 feet tall, but still). So, I ask you…

Why can’t we have this for real?

 Um…like…now. Please?

Ya hear me Congress? Forget spending money on health care reform, bank bailouts and pot hole repair. We want avatars. Skinny, toned, blemish-free avatars that can hold their own in a pick-up game against Sigorney Weaver.  We promise to stop buying gasoline, using ozone depleting hair spray and texting while driving (seriously…we won’t even need to due to the avatar brain linkage see?). And honestly, if our avatar world is sitting on some sort of valuable natural resource, we’ll just move ‘kay? You can have it. As long as you get us our bods in time for swim suit season.

 As for me? I’ll take this one please. It’s my head from 1999 (as a start…I’m sure I’ll want to do something else with it later, but in the interest of speed, I won’t be picky just now) and a bikini I like.

Thanks loads.