Just choose your diet. Counting points? Set it to Weight Watchers Wand Mode! Counting carbs? Set it to Atkins Attack Mode. Then aim The Skinny Gun© at anything you want to eat. The Skinny Gun© will calculate your numbers, keep a running total, AND shock the crap out of your hand when you aim it at items that put it over your daily total! Order today. Operators are standing by.

*And for a limited time you get the patented Hormone Zone Attachment©. At certain times of the month/life/menopause/or post-partum the Hormone Zone Attachment© will release the Mood Shooter. Instead of counting points The Skinny Gun© will release snarky comments aimed at any one or thing you choose. Just smile and point – let the Mood Shooter do the dirty work!

No more counting, calculating, or remembering. Now with The Skinny Gun© it’s Ready, Aim, Diet!

Legal notice – if someone actually comes up with this you heard it here first and we’ll be the like Winklevoss Twins. We’ll dog you for our $65 Million until you give us $80 Million just to go away. You’ve been warned. We’re pretty sure we’re legally covered now. ORDER TODAY! Oh and we MAY just change the name to SkinnyGun© because we just saw The Social Network and it seems that the Napster guy thinks using the word “the” is sort of cluttered. SO we’re also claiming SkinnyGun© – order today!

Well guess the heck what? The Lose It App on our phone just upgraded it sort of DOES have a Skinny Gun©. Oh sure it’s not called that BUT you point your phone at a barcode and KAPOW you get the nutritional info logged right into  your food journal. It’s weird. Wonderful. Effective and DANG why didn’t we actually invent it. Alas… reach for the sky The Skinny Gun© is here!

The theory is that binging or cheating is often a habit not a hunger. I agree with this. I have tried to visualize stuff before and it devolves into the following stream of gobbeldygook…

Rebecca’s Brain Stream:
In front of me sits a cream filled eclair with chocolate icing. It is so rich, I’m going to sink my fork into…oh the sink is still clogged on that one side..wonder if they’ll be enough seating on the home side…I gotta go to the bank..what’s that fuzzy thing…dang is that nail is chipped.. I like essie nail polish better than…oh crap I gotta get that laundry to the dryer…I need bangs…

I recognize the need to try different techniques to curb my cheating diet heart. Which brings me a new web site, The Virtual Diet. The site offers up snacks, treats, really any kind of food, with a lovely picture. You click on little squares to “eat” the treat and it disappears bit-by0bit. I suggest you click at least 30 times since the researchers tested 30 bites. 

The Virtual Diet has got a whole system of tracking, which I’m not doing because I already track my food in a gabillion places. And of course you could also just look for good images of your favorite foods online. But remember you can’t just look for this to work, you’ve got to pretend to eat the treat in your mind. That’s how The Virtual Diet stands out. It helps you really imagine eating the donut!

If you want to read the story about the study at Sience Daily - click here.

So will this work? Let me know if you’re trying it too. Catch you later, I’m going to imagine that I exercised. (Wait, that might not work the same way.)

If you missed the latest news in physics, let me bring you up to speed, I mean velocity.

The Nobel Prize in Physics for 2011 was awarded to Saul Perlmutter, Brian Schmidt and Adam Riess. They won “for the discovery of the accelerating expansion of the universe through observations of distant supernovae.” They looked at supernovae, which are like nova but better, and proved that not only is the universe expanding, BUT it is expanding faster every day.

My immediate reaction to this news is joy. This is confirmation of theories I’ve often espoused. Nobel laureates have now validated my beliefs that my own accelerated expansion is NOT my fault. The entire universe is getting huskier! It’s NOT the potato chips, candy bars or aversion to exercise that’s widening my hips. It’s physics!

Click Here for More on How the 2011 Nobel Prize in Physics Can Help Your Body Image!

And in techie ways to lose weight news….Pandora Radio – also free – has added a slew of new workout channels. Take a listen. One of  them is sure to help you get shakin’ bacon!

Pandora’s Workout Channels

Have a great week!

There are brown fat cells and white fat cells. Scientists believe brown fat cells are better to have if you don’t want to be obese. Brown fat cells can quickly convert to muscle. Conventional white fat cells are are just stubborn and do not want to move, other than some jiggling.

Scientifically speaking brown fat cells release energy and the sunofapup white fat cells store energy. Storing things in your body is generally bad. You want to be moving things in and out.

So why do I bring up this whole brown fat versus white fat thing? There’s relatively new breakthrough research which I encourage you to read it here… or here. Or just stay right here for my half-baked, bachelor of arts interpretation of complicated scientific data. (I’m usually totally wrong but way more fun.)

Scientists believe if you can encourage the brown fat cell to stay… and convert to muscle you’ll be leaner. Several different researchers have come up with suprising new ways to encourage the brown fat cell.

To encourage my brown fat cells to stay I’M going to tell MY brown fat cells that the school system is excellent, I’ll point out the lovely parks, and explain that wood six-panel doors are standard. The brown fat cells will surely feel right at home. Though my plan seems sound the new discovery indicates specific genes AND the presence of a certain proteins seem to encourage brown fat cells to stick around and turn into muscle.

For now that means nothing. You can’t go buy a bottle of a Specific Genetic Marker and obscure laboratory isolated protiens to sprinkle on your pack of Skittles. But these discoveries could lead to new ways of fighting or even preventing obesity. The knowledge will enhance the lives our great grandchildren as they zoom around in flying cars powered by dandelions. They’ll all be healthy and filled with brown fat cells.

But it’s still good, I am of the belief that the more we know about our fat be it brown or white the more we know what wine to serve with it.

Vintage bottle of "Wholly Toledo - Champagne of the Great Lakes." Why yes that's tap water. Oy.

help fat evacuate the body, and make our skin look good.

So here’s the latest scientific research. Let me boil it down. The latest scientistific research says that those theories about water are all wet. Research does back up the idea that people living in warm clients, athletes and people with certain medical conditions do in fact benefit from drinking water.

But apparently there’s no research to show how water effects your standard issue human-type person. In fact researchers couldn’t even figure out where the recommendation of 8 x 8 ounce glasses a day comes from.

There is some evidence to suggest that if you drink a bunch of water quickly you can prevent water retention. I’m not sure if they want you do some sort of funnel situation or what. But research shows that if you sip water all day rather than chug it you will retain water. So chug it. As dieters here’s what we believe about water.

THE DIETER’S UNSCIENTIFIC EDICTS ABOUT WATER

1. You don’t need 8 glasses since juice, fruit, and other water in your food does count towards hydration. So don’t get all freaky about the 8 glasses.

2. Do make water a treat. When you pay attention to drinking water you are more cognisant of your entire diet. Bingers don’t enjoy water in a fancy glass, no, they mow. (Pronounced like cow.) Water consumption combats the mowing. (Pronounced like cowing.) In other words, Edict #2 is about fancy glasses and fancy words, like cognisant.

3. Water does help with a hangover headache. Our researchers have collected a lot of data on this. Not drinking alcohol also helps.

4. Water makes your skin feel better and look dewy soft. Or is it doughy?

5. Substituting water for say, a martini, every third martini at the office party will keep you from getting fired.

If you have a fun way to enjoy your water please share, come on, don’t be such a wet blanket.